This is a beautifully designed website. But I also think it's quite... problematic that the child's journey begins with the egg, as if the unfertilized egg is the child — and skips any mention of the sperm and the father.
It feels like this site is almost erasing the father from the IVF process.
Many of my friends have gone through IVF and still I was surprised by some weird parts of the story.
For example: "I was stabbed with 932 needles" and when you tap you find out "because I wanted to improve my odds, I went to 31 acupuncture appointments, where 687 needles pierced my underbelly, legs and head".
It is clearly established that acupuncture is placebo, but beyond whether this placebo might actually improve the odds (highly disputed), it is an elective alternative procedure with unclear benefit, not part of a standard IVF journey.
I understand the story is a very personal one, but it would be good to remember it isn't necessarily representative of most people's experience.
Actually acupuncture has some studied physiological effects. One is nervous system mediated via the release of endorphins and then a later regulatory rebound which can have an anti inflammatory effect. I think low dose naltrexone has a somewhat similar method of action. I might have the details a bit off but the studies definitely exist if you want to research it. There are even some compounds in coffee (some of the bitter compounds not the caffeine) that have a very mild effect that works in a similar way.
Personally I’m not a fan of acupuncture and I suspect any nervous system benefits from acupuncture would be far outweighed from those of regular exercise. But maybe for people with chronic pain or other issues it could be useful.
Beautiful but heart breaking website. I genuinely hope the author will be successful in starting a family.
My partner and I are currently going through a surrogacy process, and it's been a brutal multi year project that has had numerous setbacks. At this point we are just white knuckling our way forward.
I'm glad we as a society have these options available for those that need them, but man is it hard going through these processes.
Super cool site design, I'll have to go back and look at all the other stories.
I didn't realize IVF was such a brutal process. 932 needles sounds like insanity, not to mention everything else. I'll carry a lot more compassion for those going through IVF going forward, and a lot more excitement for those able to concieve naturally.
Another good look at what IVF is really like, albeit with a really dark tinge that is not likely true in the vast majority of cases, is The Retrievals[0]. I recommend the podcast version.
What I find most incredible about it is the number of women who experienced immensely painful procedures while conscious multiple times, and went back again and again, in order to have a child. And few of them, if any, regret it.
It is simultaneously one of the most impressive feats of modern science, and one of the most unfair burdens put on any section of the populace, that they were able to, and had to.
This is a beautifully designed website. But I also think it's quite... problematic that the child's journey begins with the egg, as if the unfertilized egg is the child — and skips any mention of the sperm and the father.
It feels like this site is almost erasing the father from the IVF process.
I’d imagine she used a sperm donor. Otherwise the father would probably be mentioned somewhere.
The website is great!
Many of my friends have gone through IVF and still I was surprised by some weird parts of the story.
For example: "I was stabbed with 932 needles" and when you tap you find out "because I wanted to improve my odds, I went to 31 acupuncture appointments, where 687 needles pierced my underbelly, legs and head".
It is clearly established that acupuncture is placebo, but beyond whether this placebo might actually improve the odds (highly disputed), it is an elective alternative procedure with unclear benefit, not part of a standard IVF journey.
I understand the story is a very personal one, but it would be good to remember it isn't necessarily representative of most people's experience.
Actually acupuncture has some studied physiological effects. One is nervous system mediated via the release of endorphins and then a later regulatory rebound which can have an anti inflammatory effect. I think low dose naltrexone has a somewhat similar method of action. I might have the details a bit off but the studies definitely exist if you want to research it. There are even some compounds in coffee (some of the bitter compounds not the caffeine) that have a very mild effect that works in a similar way.
Personally I’m not a fan of acupuncture and I suspect any nervous system benefits from acupuncture would be far outweighed from those of regular exercise. But maybe for people with chronic pain or other issues it could be useful.
Beautiful but heart breaking website. I genuinely hope the author will be successful in starting a family.
My partner and I are currently going through a surrogacy process, and it's been a brutal multi year project that has had numerous setbacks. At this point we are just white knuckling our way forward.
I'm glad we as a society have these options available for those that need them, but man is it hard going through these processes.
Super cool site design, I'll have to go back and look at all the other stories.
I didn't realize IVF was such a brutal process. 932 needles sounds like insanity, not to mention everything else. I'll carry a lot more compassion for those going through IVF going forward, and a lot more excitement for those able to concieve naturally.
687 of those are acupuncture, a form of alternative medicine. So it might help on a psychological level, but certainly not a requirement for IVF.
That said, 245 is still a big number. 79 blood samples and 166 hormone injections.
Another good look at what IVF is really like, albeit with a really dark tinge that is not likely true in the vast majority of cases, is The Retrievals[0]. I recommend the podcast version.
What I find most incredible about it is the number of women who experienced immensely painful procedures while conscious multiple times, and went back again and again, in order to have a child. And few of them, if any, regret it.
It is simultaneously one of the most impressive feats of modern science, and one of the most unfair burdens put on any section of the populace, that they were able to, and had to.
[0] https://www.nytimes.com/column/the-retrievals